Wolf Dad

Kasey dragged me back to his world. When I almost escaped by slipping out of my jacket, he put his hand on the back of my neck and squeezed.  I felt claws digging in, and his hand seemed bigger than it was before. 

“Quit fuckin’ around, kid, ‘n this’ll be a lot easier fer both of us.” He said with his stupid southern accent. 

He didn’t let go of me until we were surrounded by trees. I ran from him, but I just wound up back in the same clearing somehow. 

“D’you think I’m stupid ‘r sumthin’?”

I didn’t answer him. 

“What’s yer fuckin’ problem anyway, kid?”

“Fuck you, Kasey!”

“What’re you, like thirteen?” He kept talking. “Is that when it started?  Is that why yer such a fuckin’ bastard right now?”

“You don’t know what you’re fucking talking about!!”

“Oh I don’t?” Kasey raised his eyebrows at me. “So you’re not rememberin’ shit Outside that I can fuckin’ see?  You’re not a horny thirteen year old who can’t jerk off cuz it reminds him of his mom touchin’im?  That’s not what yer fuckin’ problem is?!”

My stomach lurched and I balled my hands into fists. “FUCK!  OFF!!  KASEY!!!”

“Or you’ll what?”

I charged at him.  He didn’t try to defend himself. He just let me hit him. His muscle was hard under my knuckles like a punching bag.  After a moment he moved. He was so fast that I didn’t see him, but I was very abruptly looking up at the sky and I was gasping for breath. 

Kasey was crouched over me with his hand on the center of my chest. 

“I don’t give a shit what you been through,” he growled, “there’s no fuckin’ excuse for what I heard over at David’s.  D’you even understand what yer doin’ t’ him?”

“I didn’t *do* anything!!”

“He’s an *empath* y’little shit!!”  Kasey pressed on my chest until it was difficult to take a breath. “Your anger is *physically* painful t’ him.. and I *think* you sorta knew that already.”

I turned my head. 

Kasey didn’t fucking get it. The amount of venom I let David have was *nothing*. I was holding back all of it that I could, and nobody fucking cared!  It hurt *me* physically!  Didn’t *that* fucking matter??

“Y’know what I think?”  Kasey went on. “I think you’re scared of ‘im. I think you throw anger at ‘im cuz you know it obscures everything else.  So what did he see, huh?  What scared you so fuckin’ bad that y’turned into a thirteen year old fuckhead? Huh?”

I could feel him staring at me. Tears started to fill my eyes and a wave of anger rose in my chest. I struggled under Kasey’s hand but he was holding me down so *hard*.  I kicked my feet and managed to plant my shin firmly between his legs. 

Kasey cursed and flinched, and I scrambled out from under him while he caught his breath. 

“Yer not gettin’ outa here!” Kasey shouted. “Yer in *my* fuckin’ house now, boy!!”

I climbed into a tree and stayed quiet. 

I couldn’t tell what I was feeling. I felt angry, of course. My heart was racing. I wanted to go home. No, not home. I wanted to go back to David. 

I mean I thought that’s what I wanted, but when I saw him these days I just felt... 

I didn’t know!!  Maybe Kasey was right!  Maybe I was afraid of David. Maybe I was afraid of what he would see.  Or what he’d already seen?  Or maybe I was just angry because he changed the whole fucking dynamic of our relationship!!  He should have just kept it to himself!  I didn’t need to know that he could fucking see everything— or I needed to know it *much* earlier, before I got so attached to him!

I huddled against the tree and gripped its trunk as a wave of sobs took me. 

“There y’are,” Kasey said from the ground beneath me. 

I startled and quickly dried my face.  I scowled down at him.

“I see y’ treed yerself,” he said. “Can y’ git down?”

I hadn’t thought about how I would get down. I couldn’t quite see the path I had taken to get up here.  I really didn’t want Kasey to know that I was probably stuck. 

I didn’t want his help. 

“I’m f-fine!” I shouted, and frowned at the stammer in my voice. 

“Ok, sure, y’seem fine,” Kasey said with a shrug. 

“Would you just *fuck off*!!”

“Yeeaah, I’m not gonna do that.”

I huffed, and crossed my arms, and settled against the tree trunk.  I heard grass and dried leaves crunching on the ground as Kasey sat down at the base of the tree. 

“So what is it, huh?” He asked. “What did he see that was so fuckin’ bad you gotta be such a fuckin’ prick to ‘im?”

“It’s not—!”  I started to shout at him but I wasn’t sure how to say it. And I didn’t have to fucking tell him anything anyway!!  Fuck this fucking wolf-man!!

“Did y’ think about yer ma’ while you guys were doin’ it or somethin’?” 

“Her name is fucking Rebecca!!” I screamed. 

If he was going to keep talking about it I really need him to stop calling her my mother. It was fucked up. 

“Alright, my bad. Shit.”

“And it’s not *what he sees!* It’s *that he can see!*  Alright?!”

“Oh c’mon man. Y’knew he was an empath—“

“That doesn’t automatically mean he can see what I’m fucking thinking about!!  I didn’t agree to *this!!*”

Kasey huffed and leaped into the tree. He climbed up to my branch faster than I could even find a path off of it. He straddled the branch in front of me and pressed his hand to the center of my chest again to pin me. 

“Do *not* hit me in the fuckin’ dick again. I swear t’ god I will push you outa this fuckin’ tree.” He growled and I nodded my head. “Now let me clarify some things fer y’. David can see yer thoughts when *you* are vulnerable with *him*. He doesn’t just see ‘em cuz y’all’re fuckin’.  I bet you anythin’ he saw jack-shit the first handfull’a times.  It’s *your* level of comfort with *him* that allows ‘im t’ see inside you.  If he took it from you by force you’d fuckin’ know it.”

I scoffed.

“Oh you don’t fuckin’ believe me?”

I glared at him. 

“You want me t’ fuckin’ demonstrate?”  Kasey grabbed me by the jaw and pressed his forehead against mine. 

*No!  Stop!  Fucking don’t!!*

*I’m not gonna take anything big. But you clearly need to know what the difference feels like. Because I don’t believe for a second that David ever forced anything.*

My breath was fast and shallow. I could feel Kasey rooting around in my mind. It was like a snake slithering through all the thoughts I’d had in the past fifteen minutes. They flashed through my head invasively.  I saw everything Kasey looked at. I relived thoughts and feelings from moments before, and I could feel Kasey observing that I was like a boiling sea of conflicting bullshit. 

He let go of me suddenly and I took a breath. 

“*That* is what it feels like when someone *takes* somethin’ from you.”  Kasey spat. “David ain’t the one who changed the dynamic of yer goddamn relationship.  Y’did *that* all by yerself.”

I didn’t look at him. I looked down instead. 

“David’s empathy is what you *liked* about ‘im,” Kasey continued. “He always knew what y’ needed and y’ never had to ask him for it. He does a million little things every fuckin’ day to make you comfortable and you don’t even fuckin’ notice. His empathy is the reason he understands you— cuz like no offense ‘r nuthin’ but you are fuckin’ opaque.  I was in there for like thirty seconds and I’m like.. woah that’s a lotta shit.”

I didn’t know how to feel about any of that. I was definitely feeling something but I wasn’t sure what. It hurt. It hurt in a way that made me want to ignore it at any cost. 

“And *that*, y’ little shit,” Kasey said and poked his finger into my chest, “is what it feels like when you hurt somebody you care about.”

Tears sprang to my eyes so fast that I couldn’t stop them. I looked down to hide them from Kasey and his hand shot out to lift my chin.

“Now let’s talk about why yer afraid’a cryin’.”

I jerked my head out of his hand, and Kasey grabbed me by the jaw again. 

“What makes you think I’mma fuckin’ put up with that shit?”

I took a staggering breath and held it to keep myself from sobbing. I wanted to be alone now. I didn’t like Kasey watching me cry.   I didn’t like *having feelings* where people could see me. 

I wanted to be in my closet. 

“Just show me.” Kasey said. “I already know the reason, now make me feel the reason.  Knowing that another person understands will *make you feel better*, Marco.”

I sniffed and squeezed my eyes shut. I didn’t want to do this.  I didn’t want to share it with him. I didn’t want to hear it in my head. 

“It’ll be alright, Marco. It’s just a memory. I’ll be right here when it’s over.” Kasey touched his forehead gently against mine. “It’s right there. Just let yourself think about it.”

My mother’s voice rang through my head and I started to dissolve. 

*”Stop crying!!  Shut-up!!  Just fucking shut-up!!  Boys don’t fucking cry!”  Her image flashed through my head. She shoved me into the hall closet and slammed the door. Over and over again. Sometimes she locked the door and said, “you can come out when I can’t hear you FUCKIN CRYING!!”  Sometimes she forgot about me until after I soiled myself.  When I was ten she stopped locking me in the closet, but she still screamed if I cried in front of her. When I was thirteen she broke my arm, and told me to man-up and stop whining. “You think your cousins cry like fucking babies when they get hurt?!   Boys don’t cry!!  Stop it!! This is your own fucking fault!!!”*

Kasey lifted his head and gasped for air. There were tears on his face.  For a moment he just struggled. Then he embraced me. 

I couldn’t stop it. I just fucking bawled.  I thought we were gonna fall out of the stupid fucking tree.  Kasey was as much of a mess as I was, and he clung to me protectively as he sobbed. 

It was a long time before he spoke. We’d both run out of tears, and we were just sitting. His arms were still around me. My face was buried in his chest. His sent was strong, but somehow comforting. 

“David would‘a done this for you.” Kasey said slowly. “You need to let him in.”  He pulled back and stretched his arms and shoulders. I looked down. “Hey,” Kasey said, “I’m proud of you.”

My eyes watered again and I quickly wiped them dry with the back of my hand. “Fuck. Why would you say that.”

“Because it’s true.  Now c’mon. Let’s git the fuck outa’ this tree.  Fuckin’ bark is chafin’ my balls.”

I laughed under my breath. 

Kasey helped me down from the tree, and when my feet were back on the ground I asked him, “Can I go home now?”

Kasey laughed.  Hard.  I glared. “Oh my god!” He howled. “Are you fuckin’ kiddin’ me?  Yer not goin’ nowhere till yer a fuckin’ adult!  Aaah geez.  Yer killin’ me kid.”  He was still chuckling as he turned and wandered away from me. “C’mon y’ lil twerp. I got a cabin out here somewhere.”  I trailed behind him, and he waved me forward. “C’mere kid. Don’t walk in my blind spot. It’s creepy.”  I trotted up next to Kasey, and he put his arm around me.  “Alright, listen kid. I’m gonna tell you some true shit.  You’ve created an environment in yer relationship with David where he literally cannot do what he needs to do to help you. Yer all twisted up about him seein’ shit, so he don’t ask you to share anything, and yer dumb ass never learns that if y’just *let him in* he will *help you heal*. I mean for shit sake he’s a *fuckin’ healer*, man!” Kasey chuckled and shook me a little. 

I heaved a sigh and looked down at my hands. I fiddled with the cuff of my jacket.  I felt... I wasn’t sure. Maybe I felt guilty?  I didn’t like it, whatever it was. I just kept thinking about David. The way he looked at the floor instead of telling Kasey I was a fucking monster. 

His silence was devastating. 

If you asked me how David had been lately I wouldn’t be able to tell you. I was consumed by myself.  I couldn’t even do my fucking job. 

God I was a fucking loser. 

I sniffed and dabbed my eyes. I couldn’t stop fucking crying. 

“Hey what’s goin’ on in that head’a yers?” Kasey asked. 

“I just.. mm.” Words were difficult. “Do you think David’s ok?”

“What, right now?  Prolly not.” Kasey said. “He’s prolly a fuckin’ mess right now.  But I’m sure he’ll *be* ok.”

I watched the ground pass beneath us as we walked. 

“D’y’want me t’ send someone over to check up on ‘im?”

I nodded silently. 

“Alright then.” 

We came to a cabin and Kasey left me on a couch in the living room. The place was filled with crystals and other pagan looking shit. Kasey grabbed a few shiny rocks off the coffee table and carried them into the kitchen. He put them into a bowl and filled the bowl with water from the tap. He returned and set the bowl down on the coffee table, then he settled on the floor in front of it. He rested a strip of paper on the water’s surface. It had the name “Artemis” written on it. 

Kasey took a deep breath and closed his eyes. I watched his face. It was still for a moment, but then his eyebrows and his lips animated as though he were having a silent conversation with somebody in his head. 

Artemis, I assumed. 

It was over pretty quick. Kasey opened his eyes and said, “Arty’s headin’ over right now.”

I raised an eyebrow. “This seems like a lot of work for a thirty second phone call.”

“Yea but it was only thirty seconds cuz I didn’t have ‘t translate a whole mess’a context into words. I just knew what I wanted, and then I thought it at him, and *he* knew what I wanted.”

“Couldn’t you have done that without all this fuckin’ setup?” I gestured to the bowl of water and rocks.  

“It’s called a fuckin’ ritual y’ brat.  It focuses yer intention.  So *maybe* I coulda done without it, but it’s not that much work t’ just do it fuckin’ right the first time, instead’a dickin’ around tryin’a just do everythin’ with pure fuckin’ willpower and wastin’ a bunch’a time an’ energy.”

“Alright. Damn.”  I crossed my arms and sank back into the couch. 

“Oh, uh-uh.  Do *not* fuckin’ *pout* like I’m bein’ mean. You saw a button and you pressed it, and this is what it does.” He spread his arms a little to indicate his general demeanor. “You don’t have to *like* it, but yer not gonna pretend I’m the bad guy.  I didn’t even raise my voice. Yer just tryin’a deflect cuz y’ don’t *like* how y’ *feel* right now.  Now quit dissin’ my shit.”

Kasey walked away from me and I pressed myself further into the couch cushions. He was right. I didn’t like how I felt. I didn’t like being fucking called out. I especially didn’t like that it made me think about when I did this same thing to David. 

I didn’t even notice it at the time. I just felt salty and saw a thread to pick at. Afterward I never could remember why we were fighting. I was just mad at him. 

I angrily brushed tears off my face. It was fucking enough already, wasn’t it?!  I wanted all these *feelings* to just go away!  This was stupid!!

I kicked the coffee table and it lurched loudly across the floor. The bowl of water sloshed, and slid off the table, and shattered.

I bristled and help my breath. That was more destructive than I intended. 

“Hey!”  Kasey stormed back into the room. “Quit breakin’ my shit!”

I didn’t look at him. 

“Did’y break David’s shit when y’were mad too?!”

I felt myself flinch. 

“I fuckin’ thought so. Y’git mad’n y’ fuck up *other people’s shit*!”

I scowled and opened my mouth. “It doesn’t *have* to be other people’s shit!  Thats just what’s *around*”

“Well if yer gonna fuckin’ *be* like that, then y’can *go be it outside!*” Kasey pointed to the door. “I’ll call you for supper.  *Now git!*”

​

I stomped out of the cabin and kicked tall weeds and dead leaves as I walked.  I stooped to pick a rock up off the ground and I hurled it as hard as I could into the woods. 

I didn’t know what to fucking do with myself. I was a city kid. It was just fucking trees and rocks out here!!  I wandered around for a while. I didn’t pay attention to where I was going, but I always managed to circle back to the cabin. It seemed like I was trapped within a certain radius of Kasey. 

I found various ways to satisfy my destructive urge. I hit things with sticks, I kicked trees, I threw a lot of rocks.  

I lost track of time. I thought maybe it was starting to get colder. 

I threw one more rock, and it struck a tree and flew back at my face. It hit me square in the eye. I cursed, and staggered around blind, and twisted my ankle in a fucking hole or something.  I fell to the ground and clutched my eye. 

“Marco!!” Kasey called from the front door. “Supper!!”

“Shit! Shit! Shit!” I scrambled behind a tree and tried to stop breathing so loud. 

He was gonna be pissed. I was a fucking idiot, and I fucking got myself hurt, and Kasey was gonna be mad. I huddled into a ball, still pressing my hand to my eye.  I could feel blood dripping down my wrist.  It was hard to be quiet while I was shaking, and crying, and panicking. 

“Marco?”  I heard Kasey walk down the cabin steps. His feet crunched on dried twigs and dead leaves. He stopped calling for me but I heard him walking. Hunting.  I didn’t think I’d be able to move very far very fast half blind on a bad ankle, so I just sat there trying to sob silently. 

He got closer and I tried to hold my breath. I could hear him.. sniffing?  Oh fucking shit I forgot he could smell me!  There was blood dripping off my elbow, I could feel it. Kasey was definitely going to find me. 

“Oh my god. What did you do?” He said. I couldn’t figure out what his tone meant. He wasn’t yelling. It almost seemed like he wasn’t mad, but.. no, I was an idiot, and now he had to take care of my stupid ass! He *had* to be pissed!

Maybe he was so mad that he was calm?

Oh shit. 

He crouched down and reached for my hand. “Lemme see it, sugar,” he said. 

I pulled away from him and sobbed. It fucking hurt. Keeping pressure on it was the only thing that helped.

“Okay, okay, shh-sh-sh-sh, it’s okay.  Just tell me what happened.”

I couldn’t speak. And I didn’t want to say it anyway!  If he wasn’t mad now, he would be when he learned how I fucking did this to myself!

“Alright shug, I have t’know what happened. If y’can’t tell me y’gotta show me.”

He kept calling me sugar, or shug, and I wasn’t sure what that fucking meant. What the fuck was this??  I kept waiting for him to yell at me, call me stupid, and drag my dumb ass back to the cabin.

Kasey leaned in close to me and pressed his hand flat to the side of my face. He closed his eyes and pulled the thoughts from my head. I pressed myself against the tree behind me and braced for impact. 

But he didn’t get mad. Kasey ran his hand gently over the hair around my ear, and he pressed his lips to my temple. I was a fucking mess, and I didn’t know what he was doing. 

“Shh-sh-sh, I’m ain’t angry.  I ain’t mad.  I swear t’you I ain’t. It’s ok, Marco. Yer ok. I know why y’were scared, an’ I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Kasey wrapped his arms around me and hoisted me off the ground. He held me tight, and I clung to him as he carried me. “I ain’t gonna yell at y’.” He murmured. “Our dad ain’t here. Alright?  I ain’t him. I ain’t gonna scream at y’ fer gettin’ hurt. Okay?  Yer just a fuckin’ kid, an’ kids do stupid shit.”

He carried me inside and put me down on the couch. I huddled myself against the arm rest and Kasey left me for a moment.  I rocked back and forth a little. The motion soothed the pain somehow, and I needed to stop crying because the concussive pressure with every sob was becoming unbearable. 

It was a classic crying-hurts-so-bad-it-makes-me-cry cycle.

Kasey returned with a bunch of stuff in his arms.  He put it all on the spot next to me, then crouched down on the floor and looked at my face. 

“Hey, sugar” He said gently, and put his hands on my knees. “Yer gonna be okay. Alright?  I’mma patch y’all up, an’ I ain’t gonna be all irritable an’ passive aggressive about it ‘er nuthin’ . Okay?  Everything’s fine, shug. D’y’trust me?”

I nodded my head just enough to be seen. 

“Okay. Good boy.”  Kasey smiled at me, and touched the back of my hand. “Can I please see what’s under here?”  I sucked in a shaking breath and shrank away from him.  “I know, I know. I know it hurts Marco. But I gotta look at it. It’s prolly not even as bad as it feels. But I *do* gotta figure out where all this *blood’s* comin’ from.  Tell y’what, lemme see if this helps...”

Kasey moved his hand like he was drawing something out of my eye. I could feel something like a snake or a fat worm slithering out of the socket. My breath went fast and shallow and I tried not to whimper. Kasey took a handful of black goo to the front door and chucked it outside. 

I curled into myself on the couch. 

“I’m sorry,” Kasey said, “D’that feel weird?”

I nodded. 

“Does it hurt a lil less?”

I eased the pressure on my eye slightly and it wasn’t screaming pain like it had been before.  I carefully took my hand away so Kasey could see what I’d done. It still hurt to have *no* pressure on it, and the sobs got away from me again.   

Kasey blotted the blood off my face with paper towels. He was extra gentle around my eye.  “There, it don’t look so bad.  Head wounds always just bleed a lot. I don’t think you’d even need stitches. Ok.. I need y’t’look up.”  Kasey had a small bottle of saline in his hand, and I squirmed. “There’s blood *in yer eye*, shug.  An’ prolly some dirt. We gotta rinse it out.  Yer doin’ *so* good, Marco. Y’can do it.”

I was shaking, and I could’t control my breath, but I pointed my face to the ceiling.  It hurt to keep my eye open.  The air seemed sharp, and I didn’t like the ominous blurry shadow of a hand hovering directly over me. A blob of liquid dropped toward me and my eye squeezed itself shut.  I shuddered and turned my face away. 

“Shh, it’s ok. Can you see outa this eye? Ok, ok. Look up again.”  I pointed my face back at the ceiling. “Does it hurt to move yer eyes?  Try lookin’ sideways fer me. Ok now stay. Don’t look at it.  Don’t look..”

I dug my fingernails into the arm of the couch. Kasey dropped saline into my eye and I bit down on my lip to stop it from quivering. The saline burned.

“Not bad,” Kasey said. “Bloodshot, but I don’t see nuthin’ outa place. Now, this might hurt a little, but hold still cuz I need the light exactly how it is.”  Kasey pulled back my bottom eyelid and I drew in a trembling breath. “Just lookin’ fer dirt.”  He let go and pulled back the top lid next. I gasped and tried not to move. “I know I know, I’m sorry,” Kasey said.  “Alright, it looks clean.”

Kasey let go of my head and I curled against the armrest, sobbing. 

“Yer still bleedin’.” He said. He rooted around a in the pile of stuff next to me on the couch until he found gauze and tape. He put ointment and then a small folded pad of gauze on the cut under my eyebrow. Then he put a wider pad of gauze over my whole eye and taped it in place. “How does that feel?” He asked.

“It’s ok,” I said quietly, and I hated how high my voice sounded right now. 

Kasey took both of my hands and crouched down in front of me again. “Okay, now lets— oh shit.”  He stoped when blood flowed out of the left sleeve of my leather jacket and onto his hand and the floor. He lifted my arm and stood up to help me carefully remove my jacket. He took it outside and draped it over the porch railing. I held my arms close to my body for warmth, and when Kasey came back he draped a blanket around me. Then he took my left hand and wiped the blood off my arm. 

“Ok,” he said and crouched in front of me again. “Which foot did’ja hurt?”

I lifted my right foot and Kasey rested it in his lap. He unlaced my shoe all the way and slid it off without pulling or twisting my ankle. “It’s a lil swollen,” he said as he poked his fingers gently into it to see how much I cringed. “I don’t think y’broke anything.”

He wrapped my ankle with an ace bandage and asked me to stand up. I pulled the blanket snug around my neck and shoulders and got up off the couch. I shifted my weight onto my right foot little by little. Kasey took a couple steps back from me and opened his arms. 

“Alright, try’an c’mere.”

I took a breath, then took a step. I gasped at the sudden stabbing pain and reached for Kasey’s arms. He caught me and squeezed me close.  He put me back on the couch and grabbed a wooden cane from by the front door. 

“This’ll be too tall for you,” he said, “but it’ll help.  C’mon. Try it again.”

I stood up and took the cane from Kasey. I held it a couple different ways before something seemed comfortable, and eventually it worked. Kasey led me into the kitchen and sat me down at the table. 

“Now, I don’t really cook,” he said, “I’m a werewolf, and I mostly just eat raw meat. So.. I made y’food, but I’m not promisin’ that it’s good.”

It was cooked meat with absolutely no seasoning, and some buttered noodles that were.. I wasn’t sure. They seemed both under and over cooked at the same time.  I didn’t complain though.  I just ate it. 

Kasey sat across the table from me with a plate of raw beef. It was cut into thin strips and he ate them one at a time with a fork. 

“You know dad loves us, right?” He said. “He’s just.. he’s insecure, and ‘e hides a lot of things behind anger. I know y’get that. I think he got mad when we hurt ourselves cuz he felt guilty. Cuz he’s supposed to watch out fer us, an’ everything feels personal to him.”

I scoffed. “Like I’d fucking hurt myself to personally inconvenience him.”

“No,” Kasey shook his head, “personal like it’s his fault we got hurt. See?  That’s a terifyin’ thing to feel as a parent. Y’wanna blame anyone else, and it’s easy to blame the kid for doin stupid shit. I ain’t sayin it’s *right*, or *okay* even. I’m just sayin’ the man cares about us, even if ‘e spent most’a our life actin’ like a dragon with a sore tooth.”

I pushed my noodles around the plate with my fork. 

“Y’know, like how y’love David, but you been actin’ like a real shit lately.”

I snorted and Kasey chuckled. 

He waited until I stopped trying to eat his food, then he cleared the table and took me back to the couch.  I felt.. weird. Dizzy almost. My skin was sore all over. I noticed that Kasey was breathing hard when he sat down next to me. He was feeling it too, whatever it was. 

“Somethin’s goin’ on.” He said. 

He stood up and staggered to the front door to look outside. I could see the light from the Core glowing out in the forest. 

“That can’t be good,” he said under his breath.

The Core only appeared if it was looking for you. It happened to me regularly. Usually when someone Outside needed my help. 

I felt panic rise through my shoulders. I didn’t think I could handle anything right now, and I didn’t want Kasey to go anywhere either! 

Kasey stepped through the door and I huddled myself into a ball.  He came back a few minutes later and sat next to me again.  He put his arm around me. 

“It’s bein’ handled,” he said. “We’re gonna be ok. I sent an android Out there earlier. He forgot t’eat food and drink water, but I kin hear someone tellin’ him how t’ fix it.  It’ll feel better in a minute.”

I leaned against him and tried not to feel like I was spinning. My limbs felt so heavy.  I laid down with my head in Kasey’s lap, and he petted my hair until I drifted off to sleep.